Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Honeymooning like pros....or so we thought.

My husband carried me through the threshold and then we booked it upstairs to pack...well okay we had a little fun and then we started packing. :) Procrastinators Unite!!

Our mind set for honeymooning:
Corey: "Yeah I'm probably only going to need a pair of jeans, a pair of khakis, and a pair of khaki shorts, 5 button ups, 5 white t-shirts, and 8 pair of swimming trunks, with some underwear thrown on the side, 2 pair of shoes and yeah that's about it. Ya know, cause I'll be hanging out by the beach or pool all day."

Callie: "Tons of dresses, all my gifts from my bachelorette party, 5 bathing suits, every pair of underwear, a couple pair of shorts, no t-shirts, and a couple of dressier shirts. 2 pairs of sandals, no flip flops, my makeup, come on, what else do I need....lets just stuff random clothing in the suitcase."

We pack and go to bed. We wake up at 4:30 in the morning, Joshua drives us to the airport and then we wait. I'm freaking out because this is my first time flying. About 30 minutes before the flight, a young man who I thought was the pilot set down in front of us in the airport. I pleaded with Corey several times, to let me go and talk to him. All I wanted to do was to say, hi, give him a hug, and make sure he was certified to fly our airplane. Husband wouldn't let me. *sad day* We found out later, he wasn't the pilot, he was the flight attendant.

(Back story) The morning after the wedding I got up around 4am, took a shower, shaved my legs and then put lotion on my legs (like any normal girl) On arriving at the airport, we had to check our bags in and head through security. (Let me remind everyone again, this was my first time at an airport) So we get to the TSA line, I start taking off my shoes, my jacket, placing every item i have in a square bin. I walk through the scanner and they pull me aside. I'm freaking out!! He swipes my hands, I must have looked confused, because he said, "Oh no its okay, we just have to swipe your hands, they have some kind of substance on them that alerts the computers." So, I ask, "Oh, like what kind of substance?" To which he casually replies, "Just bomb making material." (WHAT??) I swear right then and there, I could have passed out. He then looks at the man running the computer and says, "Oh no you're good, its probably just lotion, you're good to go!" (I wanted to scream, "Of course its lotion, how was I supposed to know, my lotion had a chemical in it that alerts airport security!") One of the scariest moments of my life, beside the time my roommates in college tried to convince me to steal a cafeteria tray so we could use it to go sleigh riding (that's another story, for another time!)

The first plane ride was a little scary, the take off being the scariest and then watching everything disappear until all I could see were clouds being the second scariest part. However, the view was gorgeous after I got used to the fact that maybe our pilot did know what he was doing. Our first flight was delayed for a few minutes, so by the time we arrived at the Charolette airport we had to "Home Alone" to the next plane. (Home Alone - if you haven't seen the movie, it won't make sense, but we literally had to sprint to the next terminal.) The second plane ride was 2 and a half hours, I tried sleeping but couldn't take my eyes off of the clouds. (By the way, every flight we had, I had a window seat) The coolest part was when we flew over the ocean, the sky and the water almost blended into one. The clouds looked like huge ice burgs over the water. The view was amazing!

We finally landed in Jamaica, getting through the airport was a little frustrating and confusing. Here's where we made our first mistake. A woman was standing off to the side when we got off the plane motioning everyone to change their money into Jamaican currency. We decided it might be a good idea, it was actually a dumb idea, but funny none the less. After getting our luggage together, we follow a man out to a small bus. They loaded our luggage in and then let the girls get in the bus first, while the guys stood outside and the bus driver and the man who loaded the luggage, ask for tips. (RUDE)

After everyone boarded the bus we began our hour and a half bus ride to the resort. I had read a lot of reviews online about this particular bus ride. A lot of people complained about how bad the roads were.  Honestly, it wasn't that bad of a bus ride, of course, I'm sure my husband would beg to differ.
(Okay, so there were a lot of pot holes, and they drive on the left hand side of the road, so that was confusing, the speed limit didn't seem to matter, and the roads were actually the size of OUR one lane road but they used theirs for two! ((It reminded me of Country Boy hill) There were hardly any guardrails, they passed cars IN on coming traffic and the roads were a little curvy) Nothing a country girl like me can't handle. The other girls on the bus were sitting in the back whispering, "I think I'm going to be sick" and I'm thinking this is super exciting!! Oh, I also forgot to mention one minor detail. It also started raining on our way to the resort and (surprise, surprise) the roads didn't have any drainage system. So, as you're probably guessing the roads began to flood. (I'm not talking an inch of rain, I'm talking it was so bad in some places, cars were just standing still because they either got stuck or they were too scared to move) Our bus driver on the other hand, kept on driving. It was quiet amazing that he never fish tailed or got stuck. I was kind of impressed!

So we make it to the resort, they unload our bags and once again ask for another tip. Then we're herded into the lobby, where we fill out some forms and then we are escorted to our rooms. Our room was gorgeous. A huge king size bed, a flat screen tv, a small love seat with a coffee table, and then the bathroom (no need explaining what that contained), Oh and our amazing balcony with a view of the ocean!! The 'bell hop' was a few seconds behind us with our bags, he came into the room dropped our luggage off and then went over a few key items in the room. As he's leaving, my wonderful, thoughtful husband, for the first and the last time on our honeymoon, slips the 'bell hop' a 50 in Jamaican currency. ((It was like watching a movie, where one mob member slips another member a couple hundreds, real smooth, through a secret hand shake. Don't judge me, it was exactly like that!!)) After he leaves, I ask Corey how much he gave the man, to which he replied, "Oh a 50, I think it's like 5 bucks in U.S currency." I shrugged it off, but later that day I looked up how much 50 Jamaica dollars really is.....49 cents in the U.S. We laughed for about 20 minutes, mostly out of embarrassment! The next day we took the rest of the Jamaican currency and just put it as a credit on our account. That left us with a 50 dollar bill in U.S. currency. Which of course I didn't think we'd need cash because everything was inclusive. (but I was so, so wrong)

The Sandals Whitehouse resort was amazing! It was everything I thought it would be.
Pros:
The food was amazing (I was never disappointed. Some restaurants were definitely better than others, but no complaints on the food. My two favorites were Neptunes (baby back ribs, mussels, baby octopus, real mashed potatoes) and Cafe de Paris (crepes and pastries ((A fat kids paradise)).
The entertainment. The first or second night there they had a fire/limbo show. Before the show started they pulled some of the girls (including me) to come dance in front of everyone. We danced with the entertainers for a couple songs and then it was time to crown the queen. This consisted of each girl having 10 seconds to show their stuff (and by that I mean dancing). Oh don't worry, I definitely did the shopping cart, the lawn mower and the baptist preacher. (All of my classic moves.) Unfortunately, I didn't win. A lady who was about 65 years old had her 10 seconds of fame grinding on the guy announcing, the crowd loved it and of course she was crowned queen.
The service. We were waited on hand and foot. And everyone was super nice. Our waitress at Neptunes, Norma, was the sweetest woman ever. She gave us advice on what foods to try and she stood around and talked to us which was really nice.
The water. Both the pool and the ocean were both gorgeous! On either side, there were many options of seating. Single chairs, (some you could place in the water, others on the side with umbrellas), my favorite were the beds, with huge pillows (so comfy), and there were hammocks too!!  Everything was absolutely beautiful. The ocean was crystal clear and there were several different pools at the resort.

Cons:
Wheel and Deal day. A couple times out of the week, they allowed some of the locals to come into the resort to sell their crafts. (I hate to say this, but it was super annoying) They set up shop right next to the main pool which was near most of the restaurants. So, heading to dinner or lunch or breakfast was a challenge. (Because once they stopped you, you were trapped for about 5 to 10 minutes, trying to tell that certain someone, in the nicest way possible that you didn't have any cash and that you were just trying to go and have something to eat)
The sketchy maintenance worker who hid in the shadows. Two nights out of the week, we ran into a maintenance worker who was always out at night just walking around. The first night we met him, we tried to avoid him by walking out to one of the piers and he followed us, just making small talk. When we finally made it clear we were leaving, he offered us to smoke weed with him. (Not so shocking, but completely scary) The second night we ran into him, he ask us again, we turned him down! (luckily we never saw him a third time. The only reason I believed he was working for sandals was because he was wearing a sandals shirt, but now that I think about it, he could have gotten the shirt from a friend or bought it off the street ((makes me cringe thinking about it))


We had several funny/interesting moments on the honeymoon:
The Anniversary cake. Corey and I were laying in bed, just relaxing, when someone knocked on our door. It was a lady from the front desk. She had a plate with a cake on it, in chocolate writing the plate said "Happy Anniversary". There was also a card that read, "Happy Anniversary Mr. and Mrs. McCarthy (with a TH)!" Corey tried several times to convince the woman it wasn't our anniversary, it was our honeymoon, but she wouldn't take no for an answer! FREE CAKE!!
Tea...not sprite. One evening while eating supper, a young man came to the table. I thought he was coming around to refill our drinks, he was actually there to take our empty plates. He mumbled something (which Corey heard as, "Can I take your plate?"), I pointed at my glass and said, "I'll have some more tea please?". The young man looked somewhat confused and I repeated, "tea". He shook his head yes, grabbed my plate and walked away. About 5 minutes later, he returns, with a glass of sprite! (Corey started laughing, shrugged and said, "Well Sprite does have a T in it.")
Corey's wardrobe malfunction. So one of the things on our bucket list was to go and get a professional massage. On our way there, we had some of the worst rain we've ever seen (minus the bus ride). We walk in and it was like we had just gotten out of the shower, and water was pouring into the building. We go up to the front desk, tell them what massage we would like and then they separated us into two different changing rooms. This was Corey's first experience doing this, so when he was ask to unclothe and put on a robe, he wasn't very comfortable. He pulled the robe out of the locker and the ties on the robe were a certain way. So, he didn't bother it, he just put the robe on and walked into the sauna. The lady came back in later, and sees Corey and goes, "Uh sir, your robe isn't on correctly." Corey looked down to see half of his leg exposed. The lady gets the laugh and then brings corey into the room to join me. When Corey walked in, my masseuse sees him and then calls him a virgin (since it was his first time getting a massage and wearing a robe) We both then laid down and got a really awesome massage by two strangers, we didn't know if it was appropriate to talk to them while doing this, so we just laid there. (AWKWARD). Corey says it was a great experience, but he couldn't help but feel dirty afterwards.
The sun burnt love birds. (not much explanation here) A day at the pool, plus the first real day of sun, equals no cuddling or touching for the Presley's that night.
Wet and wild photography. As everyone knows, I love pictures and new adventures, but we had no idea what we were getting ourselves into when we signed up for a complimentary photo session at the resort. Our photographers started off slow, a couple of pictures beside flowers and scenic shots on the beach, but then things got crazy. First, it was stand in the tide, then it turned to just put one knee in the water, next thing ya know we're completely submerged in the sea. This wouldn't have been a big deal, if we weren't planning on going to dinner afterwards at our favorite restaurant. Also, all the other couples, never set foot in the water. They all kept looking at us like we were crazy, and instead of the other photographers taking pictures of their couples, they stopped and started taking pictures of us. You could have called it our first Presley paparazzi moment (and probably our last). The pictures turned out great, but Corey still insist he has sand in unspeakable places.

One of the many gifts that my husband surprised me with over the course of the wedding was a dolphin tour. I was so excited about this part of the trip 1) because I had always wanted to do something like this 2) husband got a really good deal on the trip. Unfortunately, we had to reschedule do to rain and this is where my dolphin dream tour took a turn for the worse. Since we rescheduled the company made us pay extra for transportation and to rescheduling. I almost backed out because I just didn't want to pay anymore money. We decided this was a one in a lifetime experience, so we went ahead and paid. The day of the tour, our bus driver was about 30 minutes late and when he finally showed up the whole bus smelled like marijuana! (BIG SURPRISE) There was a lot of construction on the ride to the Dolphin Cove and the bus ride was over an hour, but we finally made it. The bus drivers would always talk for a couple minutes and then turn up their cd players. (which consisted of songs singing about Jesus one minute and smoking weed the next) We finally make it to the Dolphin Cove. We were a little early so we decided to ride the camels first (remember that 50 dollar bill I told you about, well it was eleven dollars to ride the camel, that left us with about 40 left) Once we got in the water with the dolphins, the trip was definitely worth it. We got to touch them and they sang for us, they were super playful. We rode on their fins, they pushed us through the water and we got a kiss. (and let me tell you, they kiss super hard) It was seriously amazing to be that close to these creatures. After the swim with the dolphins we headed into the gift shop to hopefully buy a photo of us swimming with the dolphins. The packages were super expensive, which pissed me off because we had already given the company so much money, and we also didn't bring enough cash and they didn't take cards! (My husband has advised me not to go into detail about what happen next, lets just say we spent the last of our 40 dollars and got some great pictures of us swimming with the dolphins with some sketchy, unexpected memories to hold onto for forever) On the way back to the resort our bus driver turned on these portable DVD players and we watched early 90's music videos all the way back!

The rest of the honeymoon we spent on the resort, which I was so thankful for. By the last night I was so ready to be back in the states. It was a great experience, but maybe next years vacation can be in the U.S. (I want to go to California, husband wants to go to Boston and Kade and my sister want us to go to Disney)

So now let me explain why I don't want to fly for a long time. We had a small delay on our flight from Jamaica to Charolette. (Like I said, by this time I was just so ready to get back home) This flight was about 2 and a half hours. The whole way back we had a screaming baby on board. And it wasn't that bad at first. Corey and I were sitting in the last seats, the child and its mother were somewhere in the middle of the plane, but not even half way back to the states, the mom decides she's annoying everyone where she's sitting and comes and sits in the back with us. Let's just say there was no sleeping for the Presley's on that flight. We get to Charolette and we have an even longer delay. The first thing I do is eat and then we wait. About the time our flight was supposed to be boarded, a blonde lady with a fake voice (airplane Barbie) gets on the intercom and announces that the flight from Charolette to the tri-cities is going to be delayed because for some reason the flight crew was running late. They delay the flight about 5 times, I'm getting really annoyed by this point! (I had to work the next morning, I was tired and I just wanted to get back home to our puppy) 45 minutes later we're boarding the small plane, I swear we drive all over creation before we take off. I also promise a little boy, about the age of 7 or 8 was sitting right behind me making the most annoying sounds ever. (at one point when the plane took off he laid his head against the plane, letting the vibration extort his speech and began saying, "I sound like a robot!) But before we took off he kept yelling, "Dad look at all those red and green lights, it looks like Santa would land here." "Hey dad, can you cut off your light, I want to see the stars." "Hey dad, when are we going to take off?" (When Corey and I talked about it later, he said he just wanted to turn around and yell, "SANTA ISN'T REAL!") We were both just so tired. The plane ride was also a little bumpy because a storm was coming through, so by the time we stepped off the plane, my nerves were shot.

So overall I'd give our honeymoon an A. It was all I could have ever imagined and then some. We had a few bad moments, but memories that we'll never forget!

And marriage life, well I'd give it an A+++! I love my husband so much (I love saying that word, husband), we make a great team!! He completes me! I cannot wait for all the adventures we go on (hopefully for the next few, we can stay in the states) :)

With Love,
Callie Marie McCarty Presley
(my life as a wife)